Western Novelist in the Making

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Writers have to look the part. That’s a problem for me. As a comedy writer, what do I do, dress like Rob Petrie? I can’t do Red Skelton’s hair, or Jack Benny’s horn-rimmed glasses.

When my daughter took me horseback riding at the ranch she worked on, I stopped for this photo op. By the looks of things, I’m on my 18th western novel by now. I think the title is “Shootout at the Starbucks.”

The opening line in the book goes like this:

“Forget about paying for the coffee for the chump behind you. Bart Slackline was here for his morning brew, and all of these coyotes surrounding him just made it that much harder. He was ready to horsewhip the barista when suddenly …”

Maybe westerns are easier to write than comedy, after all.

It’s just that during the photo shoot I  shouldn’t have squatted with my spurs on.

Invisible Slackline

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My son Caleb pulls some amazing stunts, but this one I didn’t believe, even though I saw it with my own eyes.

He said, “Dad, come out and check out my new slackline!”

I followed him out to some rocks and trees where he looked at me and said, “What do you think?” as he pointed to thin air.

“I don’t see anything,” I replied.

“I know,” Caleb smiled. And with that, he walked over beside a rock and started walking up an invisible slackline. My jaw dropped.

He wobbled, shook, and waved his hands wildly as he ascended the loose slant. When he got to the tree, he grabbed the branches, turned around, and said “How was that?’’

I gave him a thumbs up, then went back to my book and continued reading about Houdini.

Kids.