Barack Obama Wants You to Buy Toenail Clippers

Anyone who has been on the Internet lately (I assume you’re not reading this on a bulletin board at work) has noticed the “stimulus” ads. I’m talking about the ones using Barack Obama’s name.

“Barack Obama wants you to lose weight!”

“Barack Obama wants you to buy a new car!”

“Barack Obama wants you to buy organic toenail clippers!”

Who are these people, and why don’t they fire their ad agencies? Do they really think that Americans want the President telling them what to do on EVERYTHING?

“Barack Obama wants you to invest in yo-yos!”

“Barack Obama wants you to sell your children to slave traders and go back to school!”

“Earn your B.A. (Barack of America) degree while sitting at home collecting unemployment!”

To have so many ads on the Internet using Barack Obama’s stimulus plan as the impetus, shows what a nation of charlatans and con men we’ve become. Either that, or we are all now taking marching orders from our new Commander in Chief. Or maybe we all are greedy and just want “the other guy” to pay for our life’s choices.

“Barack Obama wants you to plant wildflowers!”

“Barack Obama wants you to give blood to the needy government!”

“Barack Obama wants you to lick his boots! Only $29.95. Don’t delay!”

The chickens will come home to roost when Americans start calling the White House switchboard and begin asking questions like, “Mr. President, where should I send my kid to college?… Or camp?”

“Mr. Obama, which peanut butter should I buy?”

“Mr. President of the Century, where did I put my car keys?”

“Hey Barry, can I borrow the car tonight?

“What’s up with last week’s NASCAR satellite feed?

“Why are there so many questions about cars on Jerry Begly’s blog site?”

I don’t know. Maybe it’s OK for Barack Obama to be invoked about everything. After all, he asked for it.

“Hello Whitehouse? My organic toenail clippers broke. Where do I send them for repair?"

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