{"id":241,"date":"2012-08-17T07:54:19","date_gmt":"2012-08-17T13:54:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/?p=241"},"modified":"2012-08-17T07:54:20","modified_gmt":"2012-08-17T13:54:20","slug":"nasa-saved-by-comedy-writer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/2012\/08\/nasa-saved-by-comedy-writer\/","title":{"rendered":"NASA Saved by Comedy Writer"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"DSCN0448\"<\/a><\/p>\n

The other day I was giving one of my comedy cave tours at Glenwood Caverns Adventure Park. I average one joke every 30 seconds on my tours.<\/p>\n

I pointed to a gaggle of stalactites on the ceiling and said, \u201cTake a picture of these, save the photo, and turn it upside down. You will see a city on Mars.\u201d<\/p>\n

As I stood back and observed, the \u201cooohs\u201d and \u201caaahs\u201d erupted with timed precision.<\/p>\n

When they died down, I said, \u201cNow I want you to email your photos to NASA, and have their marketing department overlay them on those boring pictures of Barstow, California they keep sending out.\u201d<\/p>\n

Laughter.<\/p>\n

Apparently, one little girl did just that.<\/p>\n

NASA took the photo and did the overlay. <\/p>\n

Then NASA set up a press conference, and announced to the world that they had discovered signs of past life on Mars. <\/p>\n

\u201cSpeaking on condition of anonymity,\u201d one NASA official said that they even found an empty Starbucks coffee shop in every building.<\/p>\n

In a genius publicity move, NASA did what they learned from National Geographic. Remember when National Geographic had a picture of a fossil \u201clizard-bird\u201d on their front cover a few years ago?<\/p>\n

The \u201clizard-bird\u201d fossil turned out to be a fake from China, and they had a small retraction later on. But by then it was too late. Millions of museums around the world will refer to that photo as a proof of evolutionary transition.<\/p>\n

So NASA has proof of past life on Mars even though it was retracted in a small statement on page 7 of the Wakarusa Tribune\u2019s annual \u201cBest of Hog Prices\u201d edition. <\/p>\n

Intelligent life in outer space. <\/p>\n

NASA is raking in the bucks now that it is piquing the interest of the public. The federal budget for NASA has increased 380% per year, compounded daily, for the next 50 years.<\/p>\n

The Space Program can breathe easy and coast for a while.<\/p>\n

Now if you\u2019ll excuse me, I gotta go screw some loose stalactites back onto the ceiling.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The other day I was giving one of my comedy cave tours at Glenwood Caverns Adventure Park. I average one joke every 30 seconds on my tours. I pointed to a gaggle of stalactites on the ceiling and said, \u201cTake … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[897],"tags":[1060,736,1133,891,1123,1126,1136,1132,1052,1124,1131,1045,1135,1053,1130,1134,1127,1128,1125,1129,1137,1138],"class_list":["post-241","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-comedy-2","tag-barstow-california","tag-cave-tour","tag-china","tag-comedy","tag-comedy-writer","tag-email","tag-evolutionary-transition","tag-fake","tag-glenwood-caverns-adventure-park","tag-joke","tag-lizard-bird","tag-mars","tag-museum","tag-nasa","tag-national-geographic","tag-retraction","tag-signs-of-life-on-mars","tag-speaking-on-condition-of-anonymity","tag-stalactite","tag-starbucks","tag-transition-fossil","tag-wakarusa"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2B5nY-3T","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=241"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":242,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions\/242"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=241"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=241"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jerrybegly.com\/superunleashedblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=241"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}