The Beauty Channel

Who comes on my cave tours? Everybody. That’s what makes it so fun. Today, I had guys with tattoos all over their body standing next to Amish tourists. I’ve had Adult, educated, Europeans standing next to runny nosed little American kids. Somehow, we all are able to come together and enjoy the incredible beauty underground. I like that. It’s not like we have to fight over what channel to watch. We only get one channel underground-the Beauty Channel. Let’s all explore it together.

The Ground Drops Out

Today, one of my tour groups ran into another tour group at the top of “The Barn”. We’re talking about 40 people here. That guide said, “Jerry, do you guys want to do a complete ‘lights out’ with us since nobody’s down below us? ”
“Sure,” I said.
The guide reached for the main breaker which is not supposed to be used for turning out the lights and was getting ready to flip it off. I yelled “No not that one!” as I ran toward her. “That’s the switch for the trap door where those people are standing!” I exclaimed. I heard some nervous laughter from the group. When we switched off the proper light switch, the lights below us were still on. It didn’t get dark. Not wanting to appear completely ignorant of the switches, I said, “Oh, somebody didn’t turn off the lights off below us. Nice joke.” With that our groups parted. Tour guides have more fun than you’ll ever know.

A Dangerous Undertaking Continued

“Besides that, no one has ever come out of one of my cave tours saying, “Jerry, a rock fell on my head.”

A Dangerous Undertaking

I’m standing outside the cave with 24 tourists ready to go inside. A few of them are concerned about a “cave-in” occurring. I say to the group, “You folks paid something in the neighborhood of $10 to go on this tour. We will be about 120 feet underground . In the event of a cave-in, you can take heart that nowhere else in the world can you be buried so cheap and deep.”